The Thinks I Think... Aaron Puzey

Philosophy of the toilet.

2012-02-23T11:23:00.002-08:00

I am currently writing an extensive analysis concerning the significance of urination and defecation in John Swift's satirical novel Gulliver's Travels.

In all honesty, the research I've done has been surprisingly interesting.

Just finished reading this scholarly account, "The Metamorphosis of Shit" by Martin Pops.

If you have some free time, I guarantee you will learn, or rather see these unavoidable bodily processes in a different light than ever before. Haha, I hope this doesn't offend anyone.

http://www.jstor.org/stable/40547534?&Search=yes&searchText=shit&searchText=Gulliver&list=hide&searchUri=%2Faction%2FdoBasicSearch%3FQuery%3DGulliver%2Bshit%26acc%3Don%26wc%3Don&prevSearch=&item=1&ttl=69&returnArticleService=showFullText

Remember to never take yourself too seriously.

Aaron Joseph Puzey

Happy Birthday Maggie

2012-02-22T21:14:00.002-08:00

Happy Birthday to the sweetest girl I know.

Maggie Harris; the girl we are all so lucky to call our friend.

The girl who takes care of us all.

Love you tons Wild Cat. -_-

Piano

2012-02-21T21:13:00.002-08:00

I've always wanted to be that person at the party, who sits down to a piano and can play every song on earth, while his friends sing along with him for hours on end.

I regret to say that I am not the person, and do not see myself being that person in the foreseeable future.

I remember when I was very young and decided I wanted to learn how to play the piano. When I was left alone and was able to play how I wanted, when I wanted, as loud as I wanted, and for the allotted time I wanted, I absolutely loved it. I would play for hours sometimes...

Then I decided to take actual lessons... From an actual piano teacher...

After a few lessons, I quit. And I didn't sit down to a piano for years.

But I have started practicing again.

Over the last two weeks I've tried to spend at least an hour every day on the piano.

It's funny to say that I've been "practicing." To be honest I'm not really sure it can even be called practicing... I don't know how to read music, I don't know music theory, hell I don't even know what keys I'm playing half the time. All I have is the desire to play. So every day now, I deny my homework, neglect my responsibilities, and go and bang on the keys...

And every once in a while it starts to sound alright.

I feel myself improving. I feel myself becoming more comfortable playing out the songs, and I can't tell you how fun, exciting, and rewarding it is to see one of mine and Maggie's songs change and evolve into something new, different, and beautiful.

I hope I can progress on the piano.
I hope that I can begin writing more songs using and incorporating different instruments.
I hope that I, myself, can change, evolve, and improve as well.

Salinas Valley

2012-02-15T00:32:00.001-08:00

You left the garden, still I see you every day,

The curse of this grove; I never will shake,

This is where, where it all began,

Where it all began,

Breathed your last breath with so much unsaid,

You let me in your heart, I brought you to my bed,

You said read these books boy, they’ll teach you how to love,

Oh they’ll teach you how to love,

They’ll teach you how to…

Read every Steinbeck book from front to back,

In three weeks’ time I had a dozen heart attacks,

I was ready to love but you were nowhere to be found,

And all my love couldn’t save you from the ground,

They laid your body somewhere down in the fields of northern California,

Salinas Valley darlin’ on my mind,

And I remember you say, on that February day,

In those last moments I shared with you,

You said, “if this breaks our hearts,

If this breaks our heats than at least this love was true.”

There’s a letter I left on your bedroom floor,

There’s muddy boots laying by the door,

There’s a scar upon my forehead,

You left this scar upon my heart,

They laid your body somewhere down in the fields of northern California,

Salinas Valley darlin’ on my mind,

And I remember you say, on that February day,

In those last moments I shared with you,

You said, “if this breaks our hearts,

If this breaks our heats than at least this love was true.”

Welcome to the "Mad House"

2012-02-13T21:08:00.000-08:00

(left to right) Matthew Suamataia, Aaron Puzey, Joshua Suamataia, Robert Rolfe, Andrew Suamataia,

Recording

2012-02-09T23:10:00.000-08:00

Currently working on adding piano tracks to the songs.

As of yesterday night, including several live tracks, I added 13 new, nearly completed "Maggie & Me" songs onto my ipod.

If we've got 13 it's good odds at least 1 of them will turn out alright, right?

I'm so tired.

For about two months Maggie and I have poured countless hours into recording these damn songs...

It's strange...

It's strange because in all honesty I really don't know what I'm supposed to do with them...

Do we make a demo?
Do we just let them sit on my zip drive, residing stagnate in a folder amongst the term papers I've written throughout college?
Do we try and get signed?
Do we just give them away and lose any credibility we have as musicians?
Do we say, well that was fun and throw in the towel?
Do we sing at weddings and lame get-togethers for the rest of our years, being those desperate fools that say, "Oh hey before you leave, we're selling our disks for $2, come grab one, thanks guys, and happy 14th birthday Michelle! This is our last song, thanks for having us." Hu?

I hate this slow, grueling, frightening process.

I hate fear.

I need to just drop out of college already.

The angel on my right shoulder yells, "No Aaron, stay strong! In a matter of weeks you'll have an English degree, and within the year you'll be certified to be a high school English teacher!"

Hrmmm... That's enticing motivation.

I no longer want to do the thing that I've always thought I wanted to do.

I just want to sing with Maggie.

Change of plans.

Anyway, the piano sounded good tonight.

Chimney House Show

2012-02-06T16:21:00.001-08:00

Thank you to everyone that made last night happen.

Love you all,

Aaron

(photos taken by our friend Taylor Pendleton)

My brother Jake

2012-02-02T11:19:00.001-08:00

Congrats to my brother Jake, a world-class long distance runner, teacher, the coach of an Oregon state champion high school cross country team, father, and husband, who besides being sponsored by a number of notable running companies, is now officially sponsored by PowerBar!

Jake is one of the most giving and humble people I know. Besides his athletic prowess, he continually blows me away with his character. He is simply stated, a wonderful human being.
He is the man. I am so grateful to have him as an older brother, and as an example in my life.
Jake is a true testament of dedication, hard work, and maintaining balance in one's life.

He truly is an incredible man.

I'm very proud of you, and couldn't be happier for you, Jake.

Cheee Buggah!

Il est minuit sur votre rue

2012-02-01T22:49:00.000-08:00

Maggie and I wrote a song in French.

She sings nearly the entire song.

I think it's the most beautiful thing we've ever created. Hands down.

I'm excited to play it soon.

"Pour seulement nous"

The Chimney House Show

2012-01-31T14:21:00.000-08:00

Let's hope people aren't too pooped out on entertainment by this Sunday's Super Bowl XLVI (46)

Our friends Bart Jolley and Nate Packer are having Maggie and I over to their house this Sunday evening to sing for more of our friends. I'm very grateful for this opportunity, thankful to Bart and Nate for having us in their home, as well as very excited at the thought of how fun this night could potentially be.

Pray for good weather, and a beautiful sunset.

Thank you to all those involved.

Monsters of Folk

2012-01-27T12:37:00.000-08:00

A handful of my favorites join forces to create some beauty. I thank you all.

Red and Gold

2012-01-21T22:39:00.001-08:00

Beauty

2012-01-21T19:21:00.000-08:00

I've grown tired, of these old familiar ways,

And I've grown tired, of these endless, shadeless days,

Bring me back the thunder storm

That would bring the heat wave in,

Bring me back the rodeo that came only once a year,

I heard the carnival's in town,

Should I run and see?

And I've grown tired, of these reoccurring dreams,

And I've grown tired, of walking down these same dark streets,

Oh bring me wind that takes me somewhere,

Bring me hale that shows no mercy

Bring me beauty that could bring me to tears,

I haven't cried since I was born, oh what a shame?

Ohhh Oh, oh, Oh oh, Oh Ohhh

And I've grown tired, of this painful company,

And I've grown tired, from years without one night of sleep,

Oh bring me back to Umatilla,

Bring me back to country home,

Or rather bring me nothing dear, I'd prefer be left alone

And you don't have to believe me, but I love this loneliness,

You don't have to believe me, but I love this loneliness,

Ohhh Oh, oh, Oh oh, Oh Ohhh

A change of pace, a change of scene, (Ohhh Oh, oh, Oh oh, Oh Ohhh)

I'm so damn sick of you and me,

I'm gonna chase the sun across the sky

And never head back east,

Try my hand at something new, (Ohhh Oh,oh, Oh oh, Oh Ohhh)

Maybe find a love that's true,

For the first time in my life,

Finally do what I want to

Or find some beauty that could bring me to tears,

I haven't cried since I was born, oh what a shame?

Ohhh Oh, oh, Oh oh, Oh Ohhh

2012-01-21T16:23:00.001-08:00

I can never be as tough as I want to be, or think I ought to be.

I think I'm okay with that.

I set the bar too high anyway.

I think I'm okay at failing at this specific venture.

The Painted Bird

2012-01-18T23:49:00.000-08:00

In 1978 my father was in the process of earning his first master’s degree in Organizational Behavior Management. Needless to say, the class curriculum and the other required elements of the intensive program exposed my father and his fellow academicians to an extensive array of various vehicles of thought and theory.

My father explained to me once, half of the faculty in his department liked him very much, valued him, respected him, and wished only the best for him, while the other half, waited patiently for any opportunity, no matter how minute, to kick him out of the program, and ultimately out of the university. (I must be my father's son)

As this OBM Master’s program expected a fairly concentrated emphasis on psychological analysis you can believe the content of the course more than simply scratched the surface of "thought provoking."

One day in 1978, Dr. Bonner Ritchie, one of my father’s favorite professors, said to him, “Kim I think you are finally ready to read this.” He handed my father a copy of The Painted Bird, by Jerzy Kosinski. Several days ago my father said two things to me. The first was, “After finishing this incredible book and realizing that Dr. Ritchie believed that I had come to a point in my life where I was finally ready to read it, was received as an overwhelming compliment.” The second thing he said to me was, “Aaron, I think you are finally ready to read this.” He then handed me a copy of the same book.

I sat down, opened it, and didn’t put it down.

Without giving too much away I’ll simply explain the story line as this; the incredibly painful, graphic, real, and merciless experiences of a young boy, "considered a Gypsy or Jewish stray," who wanders the villages of Eastern Europe during WWII.

It is an unbelievable book.

I feel like I have read nearly every WWII book there is, but I can say with absolute certainty, it is unlike any other book I’ve ever read.

I’ve never read a book that hurt my heart so much as, but the closure of the book also warmed my soul.

Marc Conley says of the book, “There are brutalities in The Painted Bird that may chill you to the bone. But this saga of a homeless little boy in a nightmare world has been told so movingly that the book glows with humanity and compassion and leaves you warmly grateful.”

Virgilia Peterson writes, “It is one of the most frightening gooks I have ever read. But it is also a brave book, entirely free of self-pity, and sparely and unpretentiously and yet almost poetically written. One has to have a strong stomach to read it, but then—one has to have a strong stomach to live, too.”

I apologize for my forwardness, but to be completely honest, while reading this book, I often felt horrified when I noticed myself relating so much with the boy in the book. Horrified, and relieved at the same time, if that is possible.

“The experiences of those years made him unable to conform to the patterns of thought and behavior demanded by collective society. Again he was the outsider, the Painted Bird. Trapped thus in the unyielding meshes of this rigid way of life, the young man realized paradoxically, that he had been virtually free within the forests and villages, that within the limits of his own determination and skill he could escape from situations that threatened to curtail or end his independence. In his new environment the very means of altering the circumstances were the subject of the strictest controls. The only escape from such pressure and limitation was flight, a journey across an ocean and beyond the confines of a continent where no wings could be spread. In this flight the Painted Bird again became himself. “

Just like my father before me, after I had finished this incredible book and realized that my father believed that I had come to a point in my life where I was finally ready to read it, was received as an overwhelming compliment.

Here we go...

2012-01-13T00:55:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow night "Maggie and Me" will be playing our biggest event to date.

We are playing at 6 PM at the Ko Olina Resort.

I hate to start romanticizing the situation, but I can't help but wonder; is this really it? Are things about to fall into place? Is this the first step in this actually going somewhere?

I'm a grown man, an adult, I've watched as all my other selfish dreams have fallen by the wayside. This is the only one I still hold on to. But do I hold on in vain? Am I selfish for dreaming this dream tonight?

Regardless, I take this first step blindly.

Regardless, I'm excited for us.

I love Maggie, and the other various members of the band who come and go from time to time.

I can only hope that someday we can all be together again; maybe in Hawaii, maybe somewhere in the middle of nowhere, maybe drifting from city to city, maybe all around the country, seeing new things, enjoying each others company, sleeping on the road, meeting strangers on corners, whistling tunes that have waited decades to be heard, walking up onto stages, pulling off empty highways to look up at the sky and ask, "why are we so lucky to be able to have these night all to ourselves?"

Sometimes the dream changes, slightly, but I never tire of it's reoccurring quality.

I dream of being with those I love; relaying the messages of our hearts, recounting the moments that have brought us pain, and telling our stories of love and joy.

I want us to be somewhere clapping our hands, stomping our feet, yelling, hoo-rawin', and singing our songs to those who will have us.

Is that too much to ask?

I guess we'll see.

Library Times

2012-01-11T23:16:00.000-08:00

I got a job at the Information Desk in the Joseph F. Smith Library.

It might be the best job I've ever had.

I love it.

All-time Keiki barrels

2012-01-10T01:06:00.000-08:00

Photo cred. (Justin Smith)

This picture was taken almost exactly two years ago today.

Not much about today was any different.

Again, I was at Keiki beach, again I was with my best friend Matthew Suamataia, again I wore my favorite ten year old Quicksilver trunks, again paddled out with my signature Duck Feet fins, again never had to share the waves with more than two or three others out there, again body surfed so much that I now have blisters on my feet, again filled my canteen of barrel time, and again had a smile on my face for hours on end.

From the moment I walked down the beach access trail and caught my first glimpse of the beautiful, clear, shore break, I knew today was all-time. I seriously injured my shoulder about a year and a half ago, and since that time I have been substantially more timid in the water than I used to be. But with occasional double-over-head sets rolling in, and the sand bar catering so friendly and merciful, Matt convinced me to be brave today. We honestly took any and every wave we were in position for. We took some real lickings on some, but I promise you the reward of the other waves made it all so worth it. We were proud of ourselves.

It felt good to be brave today. It felt good to be alive today.

I love to body surf more than almost anything, and cherish days such as these.

Thank you, Keiki beach for the incredible waves you bless us with several times a year.

The ocean is honestly one of the sweetest treasures of my life.

I am so grateful for the opportunity to seek refuge, solitude, and peace in the water.

(Feel free to watch this short trailer for an incredible film coming out soon. Featured; are some of the people who have helped make body surfing what it is today. Enjoy.)

PATAGONIA & NIXON present: COME HELL OR HIGH WATER (trailer) from NIXON Europe on Vimeo.

2012-01-03T22:00:00.001-08:00

Princess Bee

2011-12-28T20:52:00.001-08:00

Gregory Alan Isakov

2011-12-28T12:21:00.001-08:00

I came across Gregory Alan Isakov at about Christmas of 2009. I was instantly hooked.

I listened to his handful of albums probably more than any other batch of music in 2010.

I still am so intrigued and moved by his music. It's so beautiful.

They are all so good, but this is arguably my very favorite of his songs.

This is by far the best live version of this song I've ever heard/seen.

Enjoy loved ones.

Dog "The Bounty Hunter"

2011-12-28T00:20:00.000-08:00

About a month prior to the Christmas break I took a job working at the Kahuku Grill. I will be quitting soon due to the fact that school will be starting in the next couple weeks, but overall, I've really enjoyed my experience working for the Hannemans. The Hannemans are a wonderful family that own the grill and I am grateful for the job and the opportunity they provided me by employing me for the last little while. I will miss working there.

Tonight was a real treat to say the least.

Over the years that I have lived in Hawaii, I have somehow happened to be in the same place as a wide range of celebrities. Tonight, I had the honest pleasure of meeting Dog "The Bounty Hunter" and his wife Beth Smith Chapman. They were truly very nice people. They were kind to everyone working, had great things to say about the food, and when I brought them one of Sister Hanneman's unrivaled chocolate chip, banana bread sundaes, they were genuinely grateful for the services we had provided them.

I will say this though, for all those of you who are still curious, the answer is YES.

YES, it is just as satisfying as you could ever imagine to have a conversation in pidgin (Hawaiian pidgin English) with Dog "The Bounty Hunter."

If you have ever seen Dog's TV show you know how interesting things can sometimes get during his televised life. You will have also observed his random, unorthodox, yet still very entertaining instances of pidgin use... It is hilarious to say the least.

We left each other with a hand shake, I gave him a slap on the back, (I got a handful of hair, the man honestly has so much hair, IT IS SO LONG) and as I left the table, Dog left us with several heartfelt shakas, and a truly appreciative,

"Thank you brahh."

We said our good-byes and that was that.

To make things that much memorable, and that much more meaningful to all of us working;

Dog left us a $20 tip.

If you are concerned, as to what Dog orders at the Kahuku Grill, he ordered a Sea food combo; Teri-Chicken/Fish plate, no noodles on the salad, dressing on the side... He was impressed, you probably would be too if I cooked your's as well.

People, Dog "The Bounty Hunter" is a good human being. Believe me.

Leave

2011-12-26T23:16:00.000-08:00

good grief.

Romero

2011-12-26T21:07:00.000-08:00

They threw roses at my feet,
I stood there like a god,
The beast had been defeated,
The children sang the triumph song,

And I could see your eyes were dancin',
I could feel your piercing stare,
They say you came from America,
"To breathe the Spanish Air,"
Oh, oh, what a woman?
Oh, oh, what a woman?

With my sword in hand and cape unfurled
I fought to tempt your ways,
The bull fell as a martyr for,
My city and your grace,
But only them, only they would hold me dear,
The crowd would sing,
They'd sing Romero, oh,
They'd sing Romero, oh,
They'd sing Romero, oh,
They'd sing Romero, oh

One night in Pamplona,
One night to feel part of the crowd,
One night of love was just enough,
To steal my victors crown,
Oh, oh, what a woman?
Oh, oh, what a woman?

But only my city,
Would hold me true,
Pamplona soothe me,
Sing the whole night through,
Oh oh, I hear them sing,

They sing Romero, oh,
They sing Romero, oh,
They sing Romero, oh,
They sing Romero, oh

Oh what a woman?

2011-12-25T00:23:00.000-08:00

Thank you Tio Teddy for this picture.

2011-12-25T00:22:00.000-08:00

To know that you are loved, is a feeling that cannot be equaled.

What will you give for Christmas?

2011-12-25T00:16:00.001-08:00

2011-12-23T10:57:00.001-08:00

It's the question that I have to keep myself from asking.

2011-12-22T13:29:00.000-08:00

We only need one mic.

Or none, that's usually the best option.

Friends.

2011-12-20T19:59:00.000-08:00

I do not understand why I have been so blessed in having such unbelievably precious friends throughout my life.

I am so grateful for you all.

I will attempt to make it up to you all.

So as I might somewhat deserve the incomparable gift you all have given me: your friendship.

I love you all.

Farewell to my dear friends.

2011-12-17T14:51:00.000-08:00

Love you, miss you, always, loving, missing you.

Always, I will cherish you all.

Harper. December 2011

2011-12-16T21:19:00.000-08:00

My darling niece Harper. If you thought she couldn't get any sweeter, I think the fact that she can only speak Spanish makes her that much sweeter.

I just love her.

Lindsay Lohan???

2011-12-13T12:36:00.000-08:00

Uhm this weekend... Where exactly do I begin?
"Maggie and Me" (This is a possible name we are thinking to call ourselves... what do you think? It's kind of sweet isn't it?) had a concert at the A-Frame, it was great fun, great people, a wonderful time and everyone was so warm and wonderful to us. Here are a few pictures, and a video taken by my dear friend Michael Schoneman. But just hold on friends... This story gets very strange...

So after our last song is over, I receive a text message from my good buddy, partner in crime, paint the town of Laie red with blood counterpart, the one and only other member of DT (Double Trouble), Matt Glendenning. The text says something along the lines of, "Hey, I hope you're still playing music when I show up with my new friend Lindsay Lohan." I looked down at my phone very confused after reading the message I had just received. I basically just ignored it and went along conversing with my other friends that were at the show. People were also starting to move things in the house to prepare for a dance party; mucho funtivities for this night. Within fifteen minutes of the dance officially starting, I start to hear these whispers going around the room, "Oh my gosh are you serious, yeah I just saw her!" "She looks way different." "Why is she here." Not much later I am informed that Lindsay Lohan, yes, theee Lindsay Lohan, the parent trap red head, mean girl, perma-fried, C-list-Celeb, recently featured Playboy spread, on parole, coke fiend, movie star is actually walking in through the doors of the A-Frame.

As far fetched as this all sounds, it really did happen, and it really did take a turn so far south that attempting to tell this story completely is only going to end in a failure. Long story short, Lohan got her purse stolen containing $10,000 cash inside, also her documents that she had to have for her court date scheduled this week or she risked spending time in jail again, Lohan FLIPPED OUT BEYOND ALL COMPREHENSION, she single-handedly blamed every brown person to be found in Laie that night of stealing her purse, nearly drove her Jeep Wrangler off the point into the Pacific Ocean, searched the entire A-Frame house for her purse, as well as searching for knives to "slit throats" and "kill", close to a direct quote; "I will kill someone before I go back to jail!" She about fought my friend Sarah Miller, she blamed Matt for setting her up to get robbed, oh and my friend Kait Devine took her under her wing, driving her around in the Jeep because Lohan actually was hammered drunk. Good Samaritan KD ;)

I actually shared a few words with the foul creature known as Lindsay Lohan at one point during the night. There was a moment when the Jeep was parked in front of the A-Frame drive way, Kait was sitting in the driver's seat, Lohan in the passenger seat, and Kait beckoned me towards her. I simply asked, "Kait, what are you doing, get out of this car." The beast called Lohan immediately stopped her scurring, and her cigarette lighting, looked up at me, staring into my soul, and with the worst chain-smoker voice I may have ever heard she asks me, "did you just tell her to get out of the car?" I was quite taken back. It was as if Lord Voldemort and Yzma from the Emperor's New Groove decided to make a child, or a piece of crap hybrid vehicle and Lindsay Lohan the unfortunate final product, of this vile (pro)creation was questioning all I believed to be true. I responded, very sheepishly, very embarrassed, "Uhm yes." Lohan replies, "Why?" I respond, "Because Kait isn't part of this." She turned her cheek, rolled her eyes, and went straight back to being a low-life crack-whore. "I need a f****** cigarette!" she yells into the musky, Hawaiian, December night.

Let's wrap this thing up. This fiasco lasted from the end of the concert: 10:20 PM all the way up until 3:00 AM when the authorities finally showed up and the purse was finally found without the $10,000 in it.

I just want to say this, for all of you who think that the media is in anyway responsible for Lindsay Lohan's life and career washing down the drain, know this, Lindsay Lohan is without a doubt insane. I feel no shame in saying that she really is a bad person. I am not a fan, any longer.

I was involved in this. Kind of exciting hu?
http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1675758/lindsay-lohan-robbed.jhtml

Best part was, my friend Brooke leaked this story to the tabloids and got paid a huge chunk of change! Blessings from paying your tithing??? Yes. I guess there is a moral purpose to be learned here today.

Sixteen, maybe less

2011-12-12T15:51:00.000-08:00

For countless reasons, it gets me every damn time.

Sixteen, maybe less - Iron and Wine

Beyond the ridge to the left, you asked me what I want
Between the trees and cicadas singing round the pond
“I spent an hour with you, should I want anything else?”
One grin and wink like the neon on the liquor store
We were sixteen, maybe less, maybe a little more
I walked home smiling, I finally had a story to tell

And though an autumn-time lullaby sang our new-born love to sleep
My brother told me, he saw you there
In the woods one Christmas Eve, waiting

I met my wife at a party when I drank too much
My son is married and tells me we don’t talk enough
Call it predictable, yesterday my dream was of you
Beyond the ridge to the west, the sun had left the sky
Between the trees and pond you put your hand in mine
Said, “Time has bridled us both but I remember you, too”

And though an autumn-time lullaby sang our new-born love to sleep
I dreamt I traveled and found you there
In the woods one Christmas Eve, waiting

2011-12-06T22:50:00.000-08:00

I feel so much older, with everyday,

I hear the tick of the clock, saying death comes to stay,

And I feel my heart, change with the leaves,

And I believe dreams, fade like old memories,

And I am alone, amongst all of you all,

And I fear this storm, won't be moving along,

I think that I've been here before.

With my pockets so empty, I stole back my coins from the well

And I've been spread so damn thing, Why do I do it, to myself?

And I fall in love everyday, Oh why do I do it, to myself?

With my fists cut and bleeding,
My eyes swollen shut,
My ribs bruised and broken,
Finally ran out of luck.....

At least I got in a punch or two.....

With my pockets so empty, I stole back my coins from the well

And I've been spread so damn thing, Why do I do it, to myself?

And I fall in love everyday, Oh why do I do it, to myself?

Iron and Wine

2011-12-04T15:54:00.001-08:00

I may end up just sitting around all day and listen to Iron and Wine.

I absolutely love this music.

I would say that without a doubt, Sam Beam's music has played a role in the evolution process of my own music. If you want to be soothed and have your heart lulled to sleep turn on an Iron and Wine album.

Walking Far From Home is from his newest album, "Kiss Each Other Clean". This album has received mixed reviews, considering the fact that the new songs were recorded in a fashion that Iron and Wine fans aren't used to hearing from Mr. Beam. It is definitely different, but I absolutely love the variation of sound.

These are a few that I especially love: I tried to pick my favorite song from each of these albums, there truly are so so many songs, and so many that I absolutely treasure, but anyway, I hope you enjoy these ones.

A.E. Housman

2011-12-02T13:27:00.000-08:00

When I Was One and Twenty

When I was one-and-twenty
I heard a wise man say,
'Give crowns and pounds and guineas
But not your heart away;
Give pearls away and rubies
But keep your fancy free.'
But I was one-and-twenty,
No use to talk to me.

When I was one-and-twenty
I heard him say again,
'The heart out of the bosom
Was never given in vain;
'Tis paid with sighs a plenty
And sold for endless rue.'
And I am two-and-twenty,
And oh, 'tis true, 'tis true.

Beneath The Sun

2011-11-26T16:24:00.000-08:00

November's cold beneath the dim moon light
Tarnished these walls that our love will haunt

Winter would raise my voice to the night,
Screaming those words that will not be forgot,

But I never heard, it from your mouth,
Your lips they'd bleed, your words still tied,
Down there you hide.

And your brothers long, to spill my blood,
Give them the go, and here they'd run,
Penance be paid; beneath the sun.

And oh my Lord,
Dear God,
What have I done to you?

And oh my Lord,
Dear God,
What have I done to you?

And oh my Lord,
Dear God,
What have I done to you?

And oh my Lord,
Dear God,
What have I done to you?

And oh my Lord,
Dear God,
What have I done to you?

And oh my Lord,
Dear God,
What have I done to you?

Thanksgiving 2011

2011-11-25T14:09:00.001-08:00

"It's Thanksgiving Eve! ALL CLASSES CANCELED!" -Maggie Harris (A text I received from her the day before Thanksgiving. She's just the sweetest girl there ever was.)

I had a great Thanksgiving. I spent it with many wonderful people. These are the names of some of the many people I was able to spend Thanksgiving of 2011 with: Ted Davis, Paul Clonts, Ian Patton, Evan Fa, Lindsay Warner, Trent Johnson, Maki and Checka, Gideon, Morgan, Courtnay Bennett, Thomas Rivers Puzey, Steph Puzey, Harper, Clark Reynolds Cahoon, Matthew, Anderw and Josh Suamataia, Christian Carlson, Kenzie Carlson, Marc Winchel, Rob Rolfe, and many others. It was a great day.

I missed all of my friends that were in Kauai over the weekend. Excited to see all of them again soon.

Mason

2011-11-21T13:47:00.000-08:00

About six years ago I vividly remember hearing a song entitled "Adrian" by Mason Jennings. At that moment in my life, after being moved more than I can describe, I decided that I would learn to make music. After a year of wasting more time, I stole my mom's guitar and learned how to play. Mason Jennings has always remained one of my very favorite musicians, he continues to pump out albums and write songs that simply force me back into my seat, to reflect on my own life, and ponder all things.

I am forever indebted to Mason, and so glad that I heard this song all those years ago.

Another little gem from Mason

Pounders Beach

2011-11-20T17:29:00.000-08:00

Yesterday afternoon I was fortunate enough to have one of my buddies Todd Everette drop by my house. He rushed in and invited us to go to pounders with him and another friend of ours, Ted Lowe. We also met our friend Gideon Kaonohi there.

Pounders beach is famous for it's sometimes massive shore break. It's located about half way between Laie and Hau'ula and is certain to draw a fairly sizable lineup every time a swell rolls to the east side. If I were to say what my "home break" is, I'd have to say Pounders (Poundaaahhhhzzzz). I have spent a ridiculous amount of time at that beach. Often times by myself, often times simply sitting on the natural made bench near the cliffs up by the bushes. It truly is one of my favorite places to be on the island.

One of my very favorite Pounders trips that I make is with Clark Cahoon every few months. We body surf, we discuss too heavy of issues out in the water, sit on the beach and enjoy each other's company. I love it.

I used to go to Pounders with Rachel all the time. It's a sad but great memory I cherish.

I used to go at least three times a week to pounders with Justin Smith, God, we had such a blast. We would get into his mildew encrusted honda accord, pray that it would start, take the back roads through PCC avoiding any cops that might recognize his unlicensed/uninsured/unregistered car and give us trouble. We'd get to Pounders and spend hours there. I have watched Justin spend literally three hours body surfing without coming in once. Body surfing was one of his buzzes that would fuel him for quite some time. It gave him such joy. He was fearless in those waves. I saw the kid take waves that make me still cringe thinking back on em. I miss him dearly.

I have gotten girls phone numbers at Pounders. Thank you Pounders, for shacks and your ability to lure in bikini clad bombshells.

I realized about a year ago that I've actually been to Pounders with every single member of my immediate family. Sometimes when I'm in the water, I look up towards the shore hoping that my dad is up on the sand watching me, smiling proudly, or that my mom will be up there walking with all the grandkids, pointing out all the different plants and teaching them the names of all the beautiful flowers. I want to look back and see Dallin running into the water, yelling out, "Wait up for me Aaron!" and I want to, I want to wait up for him.

Yesterday was probably 3-4ft (hawaiian) with a few mountains rolling in every once in a while. Todd, Ted, Andrew and I spent most of our time body surfing, it certainly wasn't an ideal day to body surf, it was a little too windy and the waves weren't barreling like I would have wanted them to, but I did squeeze into a few perfect little tubes. On days like yesterday when the waves were how they were, there really is only one thing to do: SOFT TOP RUSH DA BIG WAVES. Luckily Gid had his Wavestorm with him. It's a pretty tiring operation surfing a sof top out at pounders. Usually, well at least I don't wear a leash. I have in the past but sometimes when you pull into a tube at pounders and get smashed, you want to distance yourself from your board as much as possible. I have gotten cut up pretty good from my fins finding me when I'm being rag-dolled. So, without a leash you have to go chase your board if it gets away from you. Gid got pretty tired, fairly quickly and told me to take it out. Man, I love being on a wave storm at Pounders. Wave storms are 8' long and because the waves at Pounders pick up so fast, you can catch a wave before anyone out there. I waited around patiently, being very particular of the waves I took. By the time I was done I had caught 3 perfect lefts, each one almost identical to the others: A big set, about 4-5ft, (few feet over head), slow at first, pop up take the mellow drop, watch em line up, feel the wave wake up under your feet, watch the barrel form, duck down, get in the tube for a second and a half, and kick out, avoiding the certain Pounders lickings that can conquer the strongest of men. It was too much fun. It's crazy how much joy can come from a short ride on a surfboard. It's something I will never get tired of.

The pictures are of Pounders,

One picture is of my friend Chase Carlston, a Wave Strom legend,

One picture is of one of my broken soft tops that was defeated at Pounders a while back. (When I was bald)

2011-11-20T16:35:00.000-08:00

I usually never get sick of this song.

Hear this.

2011-11-19T01:33:00.001-08:00

Wasteland

2011-11-17T17:07:00.000-08:00

I hold in my hands, the fear of the dust,
There's bones that lie dry in the stream,
And Jacob and Tommy, are fighting a war,
That grandpa said be over by spring,
And Mama she wait's for the bad news,
She knows it'll be coming before long,
And low and behold, the winter blew cold,
Now grandpa and my brothers are gone.

And there's ghosts out there waiting tonight,
And ghosts walk the streets every day,
Coming to see everything that has changed,
Since the moment their ships sailed away.

No they won't ask for you pity,
And they won't ask for your tears,
But how, how did we get here?
The question, echoes in every ear.

Now home, now this home it don't feel like,
No this place don't feel like home!
Now home, now this home it don't feel like,
No this place don't feel like home!

And will I pay for my father?
And will my son do the same?
'Cause I never wished, for any of this,
The son of a farmer, 'till the grave.

They sing no songs of hope in the Wasteland,
Just the wind, and it's haunted sound.
And only in you, is beauty found true,
Ohhh and now,
There's only one way out.

But you, could be my savior,
Yeah, you, could be my savior,
Oh you could be my savior,
Oh you could be my savior.

November 17th

2011-11-17T16:47:00.000-08:00

Last night Maggie and I played a few songs for a hunger awareness banquet. It wasn't the best or most enjoyable performance Mags and I have done, but it was fun and I felt grateful that the people running the event wanted to include us in someway. Afterwards a few of our friends, as well as Rivs and Harp face decided to join us in Michael Schoneman's office to listen to a few more songs; old and new.

Michael informed me today that he was secretly filming this one haha, I'm glad he did.

This song is called Anna Lee. I think it's safe to say that when this song is performed, it is an emotional experience for all those involved, as well as those watching and hearing what is happening. I don't mean to sound arrogant, that is not my intention at all but I am grateful that with the help of my very talented friends we were able to create this beautiful song. A phone video doesn't quite do it's justice, but none the less thank you Mike for filming this. It would take a while to fully explain the personal and emotional significance of this song to me, so I won't do so. Just know that I love you Anna Lee.

The actual recording of this song is in progress; expect it to sound relatively similar to this.

Thanks again Mike, this video, although rough and often interrupted by Harper's adorable little self is probably the best sounding version yet.

P.S. how good does Teddy sound on the violin? Good greif.

I am blessed to have such wonderful and talented friends.

November 16, 2011 Christian Free Verse

2011-11-16T13:17:00.001-08:00

So about a month ago, I thought I had invented a new genre of rap music; "Christian Free Verse," today I was informed that I am not the first Christian Free Verse O.G. My quest for originality continues.

Always

2011-11-14T22:18:00.001-08:00

Here I am again,
Wondering what I've done,
For six long years I've been living in,
These eight dollar bottles of rum.

And there's so much to tell you,
But all my words are lies,
Just like every other brick,
On which I've built my life.

And here,
Here is your warning,
Stay clear from me I won't be there in the morning,
To kiss your cheek and tell you, you're all that I need,
'Cause it ain't true,
Baby I need so much more.

And Papa says he's fallin',
Back into his old ways,
But I've got no excuses,
And no one here to blame,
For all of this,
They say it's in my blood,
'Cause these have been my ways,
These have been my ways,
These are my ways of always.

Now don't hold on to me,
You don't want to go this way,
Sitting by your lonesome,
Drunk on Christmas day.

'Cause I have seen rock bottom,
And believe me when I say,
Rock bottom feels like a picnic,
On a nice, warm summer's day.

And here,
Here is your warning,
Stay clear from me I won't be there in the morning,
To kiss your cheek and tell you, you're all that I need,
'Cause it ain't true,
Baby I need so much more.

And Papa says he's fallin',
Back into his old ways,
But I've got no excuses,
And no one here to blame,
For all of this,
They say it's in my blood,
'Cause these have been my ways,
These have been my ways,
These are my ways of always.

So long, I won't be seeing you, my one and only love,
So long, I won't be seeing you, my one and only love,
So long, So long, So long,

In a few months time.

2011-11-14T12:22:00.001-08:00

God willing, and honor code permitting, I want my hair to look like this in a few months. I'm excited at the notion of looking like a ritzy bootlegger.

Drive.

2011-11-14T12:18:00.001-08:00

This is a good movie I watched the other night with my friend Matt Glendenning.

Starring Ryan Gosling and Carey Mulligan.

Home / Testimonies / Jeffrey C. Wynn

2011-11-14T10:25:00.001-08:00

I was raised a Catholic, but I became an atheist somewhere between eleven and twelve years old. By college, I had evolved into an arrogant, militant, abrasive atheist. You’ve probably met the type.

In my junior year as a physics major at Berkeley, I realized that the belief system of an atheist had at least as many unproven assumptions as—and fewer explanations than—the belief system of any adherent of faith. Explain the Anthropic Principle, or what preceded the Big Bang. The unprovable idea of a Multiverse? That won’t even pass for a theory, much less a scientific hypothesis—it’s untestable, so by definition is not science.

So which is the more assumptive, i.e., non-scientific belief system?

I cast around for an alternative: Islam, Daoism, Buddhism—but avoided off-shoots of where I had come from and had already rejected. Around a year later was talking with the girlfriend of a high school buddy—they had both become Mormons—and I asked what drew her to this. Her answers struck me in several ways: LDS doctrine proposed a testable approach for confirmation of its truthfulness. It is a belief framework that was amazingly self-consistent, and also consistent with my observations of the world—including life and death, and vague memories and recognitions that I now realize are an imperfectly opaque Veil.

As I investigated the startling claim of receiving and translating golden plates, I nearly blew it all off. However, after I read through the Book of Mormon, I was amazed at the details. I read the Testimony of the Three Witnesses and that of the Eight Witnesses. As I pondered the utter improbability of gathering eleven people from my neighborhood to sign such affidavits—and never renege on them—I got my first taste of something I had never experienced before: the touch of the Holy Ghost. It nearly knocked me down—I was crying. I once heard a friend compare this experience to taking a teaspoonful of honey and feeling the warm glow suffuse through your entire body. Subsequently I learned of how closely 1 Nephi describes the Frankincense Trail, and how closely 3 Nephi 8 describes a volcano-tectonic event an order of magnitude greater than the 1980 eruption of Mount St Helens. None of this information was available to a 22-yr-old with a third-grade education in 1827. There are lots of others, but I have direct personal experience with these.

As I have grown older I have had many, many “coincidences” happen. A man in a coma for four days sat bolt upright as I gave him a blessing. I was warned exactly when to depart with my family from a lucrative job in Saudi Arabia—nearly five hours before I received orders, otherwise out of the blue, to stop practicing my religion. The departure time I was given (October 1995) made absolutely no sense—but I later learned that this saved me from a Reduction in Force in the USGS, allowed a son to start and complete high school in Switzerland, and permitted two daughters to complete college in Montreal. I’ve had unusual success in a long career as a scientist—I have never had to waste time knocking around in a dead-end research path. Some of these miracles were small, some were big . . . but together they make a compelling, cumulative pattern. The aggregate of all these miracles and answers to prayer has become so overwhelming that I could never deny my faith—I would have to ignore my entire previous life experience to do so.

I once listened to Don Lind (the astronaut/astrophysicist) give a lecture at the University of Arizona. In that lecture he made an interesting point, which I paraphrase here: “This is the only religion I can follow and not have to believe one thing on Sunday and something else the rest of the week. This is the only religion I can adhere to as a scientist.”

I suppose this is why we use the word “Amen” —Yes! Exactly.

singing with friends

2011-11-13T22:11:00.001-08:00

pictures by my friends Clark Reynolds Cahoon and Emma Erickson

Singing--November 7, 2011

2011-11-08T02:02:00.000-08:00

photos by my dear friend Bart Jolley.

I don't know if anything in my life has ever brought me as much joy as singing with my friends does. I love these people, and I am so grateful for the opportunity that I have to create something beautiful with them.

If the most that ever comes from us singing together is a handful of memories from our twenties, I will cherish those memories forever.

God willing though, I'm on my way.

This Business Called Love

2011-11-05T00:37:00.000-07:00

Written by Aaron Puzey and Maggie Harris

Aaron:
Let's make our way to the mountains tall,
With every step you take, I'm here to catch your fall,

And we'll take that path where the crickets play,
The same damn song every damn day,

Together:
'Cause it don't get old,
This kissin', singin', huggin', routine we got on,
No it don't get old,
We dove head first in the water so clear,
And we don't intend to leave down here,
'Cause it don't get old,
Being in, this business called love.

Maggie:
I've got my mind made up about you and I,
You give me all a girl could want, Most of the time ;) (last part said in talking voice and jokingly)
But hunny don't you worry, let me make this clear,
You're the only boy that I will ever hold dear,

Together:
'Cause it don't get old,
This kissin', singin', huggin', routine we got on,
No it don't get old,
We dove head first in the water so clear,
And we don't intend to leave down here,
'Cause it don't get old,
Being in, this business called love.

Float away with me,
Float away with me,
Float away with me,
Float away with me,
Float away with me,
Float away with me,
Float away with me,
Float away with me,
Float away.........

'Cause it don't get old,
This kissin', singin', huggin', routine we got on,
No it don't get old,
We dove head first in the water so clear,
And we don't intend to leave down here,
'Cause it don't get old,
Being in, this business called love.

Marilyn Monroe

2011-11-04T23:21:00.000-07:00

There's a bond that's breaking on the south side of town,
A secret that he'll never find,
But as the drive-in film plays and the August sun fades,
Marilyn Monroe lights up the night.

In the garden I'll wait so patient you'll see,
For the rain to someday return,
There's a rooster that crows and a neighbor that knows,
But God willing she won't say a word.

Well let me paint a picture so true and complete,
Not a sliver of doubt will remain,
You see my sister has been lyin' and now her children are cryin',
'Cause they're mama, is in another man's hands.

There's a lady whose stumblin' on the south side of town,
Her beauty is something of God,
But she don't realize as the tears drown her eyes,
How quickly everything's lost.

She can hold on her own most every night,
And feeds her babies most every day,
But when she puts on that gin and her white dress to spin,
Well she can dance 'till there's no songs to play.

Well let me paint a picture so true and complete,
Not a sliver of doubt will remain,
You see my sister has been lyin' and now her children are cryin',
'Cause they're mama, is in another man's hands.

And the lights they will fade as the morning draws near,
'Till the night calls the crowds "come back in!"
And then this beauty in white,
Will kiss her babies good night,
And make her way,
To the south side of town.

Colorado

2011-11-04T23:09:00.000-07:00

Aaron:

Where did you find the strength to climb out of the cave,
As the storm was ragin' through the night?
Well all of Denver sleeps with eyes closed they don't even hear the rain,
Not a soul will wake 'fore morning's light.

Well I hopped a train headed north, baby I am on my way,
Flyin' beneath the silver moon,
Oh don't you worry, don't you bother, don't believe a word they say,
I'll be seeing you soon.

Colorado knows my pain,
She fills my cup with heaven's rain,
Ohhh know me like a secret, baby love me like a prayer,
Know that I will always find a way,
Always find a way to make it there.

Maggie:

Oh Oh Oh baby I've been waiting, seems I've waited all my days,
How is life on the road?
Ohhhh baby how I miss you, I'll be counting down the days,
'Till you make it safely home.

Colorado knows my pain,
She fills my cup with heaven's rain,
Ohhh know me like a secret, baby love me like a prayer,
Know that I will always find a way,
Always find a way to make it there.

Aaron:
So what do you think?

Maggie:
You ought to come on home.

Aaron:
Well how do you feel?

Maggie:
Looonely as hell.

Aaron:
(Chuckle) Ahh well then now baby, What do you need?

Maggie:
Hunny I need you.

Together:
Well let's get those books we always meant, to find the time to read,
And waste our better years in the sunlight,
Ohhh to have it all of nothing dear, It don't mean a thing to me,
I won't mind if you don't mind,
No no no, I won't mind if you don't mind,
No no no, I won't mind if you don't mind.

Love Without an End

2011-11-04T23:02:00.000-07:00

Sung my dear friend Maggie, written by Aaron Puzey

I hear him call my name,
Through, through the wind,
And I often wonder,
Where did this all begin.
'Cause it was so easy to love him,
And so damn hard to leave,
But I skipped town and broke his heart,
He's still there waiting for me.
I never meant to cause this harm,
Lord knows I tried so hard,
But if you didn't know,
Sometimes your best can only take you so far

I was running from danger,
I was running fear that crept on in,
I was running from demons,
And I was running from love without an end.

So I walk my own way,
Through, through the darkest night,
I can't help but think there must have been something that I,
I could have done to make this right.
But it was fear that brought me to this,
And pain that held me back,
He offered me a helping hand,
But I never gave him the chance.
And so I live with this regret,
I'm gonna' die with this cold heart,
I fall down to my knees,
I knew of nowhere else to start

I was running from danger,
I was running from fear that crept on in,
I was running from demons,
And I was running from love without an end.

Jolene - Ray Lamontagne

2011-11-04T11:02:00.000-07:00

Cocaine flame in my bloodstream
Sold my coat when I hit Spokane
Bought myself a hard pack of cigarettes in the early morning rain
Lately my hands they don't feel like mine
My eyes been stung with dust, I'm blind
Held you in my arms one time
Lost you just the same
Jolene
I ain't about to go straight
It's too late
I found myself face down in the ditch
Booze on my hair
Blood on my lips
A picture of you, holding a picture of me
in the pocket of my blue jeans
Still don't know what love means
Still don't know what love means
Jolene
Ah, La, La, La, La, La
Jolene

Been so long since I seen your face
or felt a part of this human race
I've been living out of this here suitcase for way too long
A man needs something he can hold onto
A nine pound hammer or a woman like you
Either one of them things will do
Jolene
I ain't about to go straight
It's too late
I found myself face down in the ditch
Booze in my hair
Blood on my lips
A picture of you, holding a picture of me
In the pocket of my blue jeans
Still don't know what love means
Still don't know what love means
Jolene
La, La, La, La, La, La, La
Jolene
La, La, La, La, La, La, La
Jolene

Dante Gabriel Rossetti

2011-11-02T14:47:00.000-07:00

Sudden Light

I have been here before,
But when or how I cannot tell:
I know the grass beyond the door,
The sweet keen smell,
The sighing sound, the lights around the shore.

You have been mine before –
How long ago I may not know:
But just when at that swallow’s soar
Your neck turned so,
Some veil did fall, – I knew it all of yore.

Has this been thus before?
And shall not thus time’s eddying flight
Still with our lives our love restore
In death’s despite,
And day and night yield one delight once more?

Bon Iver

2011-10-29T20:33:00.001-07:00

2011-10-27T14:29:00.000-07:00

busy recording some of our music.
neglecting all responsibilities.
oops.

I go to the field.

2011-10-25T12:55:00.000-07:00

Today is one of those days where I walk into the library, knowing that I'm not going to be leaving this place till it closes at midnight.

To be honest I really don't mind days like this.

I think there is something to be said about the fact that I'm okay with it.

I like working hard, I wish I didn't get sidetracked, but I love the opportunity to focus for an extended period of time and see the fruits of my labor at the end of the day.

I remember how much I used to love working on the farm; bailing hay for 24 hours straight, seeing the sun creep over the hills, lighting the massive fields of alfalfa that you never knew were really there, simply following the headlights of your tractor all night, circle after circle, bail after bail, hour after hour. As we orbited the sprinkler line; time and time again, the sun was busy traveling around the earth, bringing it's gift of sunrise and leaving with sunset where ever it roamed.

Morning radio news came on, jokes told way too loud and way too often about George W. Bush filled our tractor cabs. Mrs. Pelzer would come on our CB radios and kindly say, "Boys, you want some coffee or anything?" We'd all respond back sheepishly, voices cracking due to our sleep deprivation and the fact that we hadn't spoke a word in the past 9 1/2 hours of darkness, "Yes ma'am." We'd watch as her 5' frame drove that two ton pickup truck right through the field, straight to the base of our tractor wheels, parking right in front of us, saying without words, "You boys aren't driving another foot until you've had some food in you." She'd hop out with four Tupperware boxes filled with last night's leftovers, a thermos of coffee, and then always open up the tail gate for us to get at the water cooler and have a place to sit. "You boys look like you could use some sleep, is Joe working you too hard again?" She'd smile and we'd all laugh. Such a sweet old girl that Mrs. Pelzer. After we were done eating we'd help pick up the mess, sweep off the cornbread crumbs on the tailgate, say "thank you Mrs. Pelzer," and wait for the same farewell speech that she gave every morning, "K boys, I'mma tell Joe to send you all home early, it ain't right for boys as handsome as you to be spending all summer out in these fields instead of chasing around girls and gettin' into some trouble. I'll see you tomorrow boys."

She'd drive away in a cloud of dust and we'd sit around waiting till she was out of sight. We'd lean on the tractor of whoever brought the tops for that day, roll our cigarettes, smoke them, roll up another for our next break, finish our coffee, and start back up. We had started from the widest parts of the fields each day, the first pass always being the biggest circle, moving in, with each pass getting smaller and smaller, by the end of a field the circles were only about the size of a horse corral. In fields as big as these, I would often forget that I was out there with two to four other guys; it was nice when the passes became smaller and you could see a familiar face in the tractor passing by. Sometimes we'd even wave at each other. It was such a comfort to know that you weren't alone in that dark field.

Falling in and out of sleep for the next few hours, blaring EAGLE 106.5 classic rock to keep me from falling into dreamland, we would finally call it a day when the last bail tied, fell to the ground. The thump of the bail hitting the earth and the relieving pressure on the tractor was like the weight of the world falling off a troubled man's shoulders. It was the fields way of saying, "I've given you all I have my friend. Don't forget me though. Before long you will need me again, by then I will be tall, and ready to give you all I have once again. Always come back, for I will always be here."

I learn from the fields. I learn from the hours that pass. I learn from the light that says, "I am here again, I may leave for a short while, but I will never forsake you."

Are you kidding me?

2011-10-25T01:15:00.001-07:00

Is she not the most stunning woman on earth? Good grief, take me back 50 years and please let me fall in love with you then, please?

See this movie. Please.

2011-10-22T21:28:00.000-07:00

Burn

2011-10-22T21:14:00.000-07:00

Paint the sky,
Fourth of July,
The song of a child,
Everyone is dancing,
On Emery street.

Take a flame,
To your father's name
A smile on you face,
A fire for the whole town,
To see.

And burn,
Burn down the shame,
And burn,
It still burns today.

Cold hands,
You take what you can,
To feel like a man,
You come like a thief,
In the night.

And burn,
Burn down the shame,
And burn,
It still burns today,

It still burns today.

Yeah Ray

2011-10-22T21:11:00.000-07:00

2011-10-21T14:46:00.000-07:00

I don't wanna dream if it don't come true!
I don't wanna dream if it don't come true!

Shakespeare's mean words

2011-10-21T14:11:00.000-07:00

Today in Shakespeare class we were grouped off into pairs, then we were given a hand out with different insults that Shakespeare used in his plays, we were then asked to make up our own different combinations of these words into our own personal insults. After we had made our own insults we were asked to verbally battle our partner. My partner Brian and I were nominated as one of the best pairs, we had to perform out verbal battle in front of the class. I don't have Brian's insults with me, they were great, they cut deep, but I have mine. Here they be:

You, threadbare, marble-hearted, glass-gazing, shoulder-clapper!

You, twangling lily-livered, cream-faced, coxcomb!

You, slovenly, whoreson, puke-stocking!

You, juggling, pigeon-livered, whoremonger!

You, insinuating, logger-headed, double-dealer!

We performed our bantering of insults as intensely and passionately as possible for two inexperienced actors. It was a lot of fun. We got a lot of laughs from our classmates, and everyone enjoyed themselves in class today.

Needless to say, Shakespeare doesn't have to always be torture.

Anna Lee Part I

2011-10-20T22:38:00.000-07:00

I'll rise up early with the,
I'll rise up early with the morn,
Feel the sun beat down upon my back,
Feel the sun beat down upon my back.

I drip my sweat into the,
I drip my sweat into the earth,
Heal the famine with tears from my own hands,
Heal the famine with tears from my own hands.

I ask for just one drop of,
I ask for just one drop of rain,
Heaven show your face if you can hear,
Heaven show your face if you can hear me.

'Cause these hands,
Can only do so much,
This heart,
Can only take so much,
But my breath,
It won't last the night,
But my breath,
It won't last.

Scatter my ashes in these,
Scatter my ashes in these hills,
These hills the only home I know,
These hills the only home I know.

'Cause these hands,
Can only do so much,
This heart,
Can only take so much,
But my breath,
It won't last the night,
But my breath,
It won't last.

2011-10-19T14:20:00.001-07:00

Well I have to post this as well. It's too good not to.

The Ten Commandments

2011-10-17T10:48:00.001-07:00

I will not tell lies
I will be honest with myself and everyone
I will not say mean things about the other boys and girls
I will be a good friend
I will thank Jesus for being a good friend and brother
I will wake up earlier, and go to bed earlier
I will not waste food
I will clean my room, and wash all my dishes
I will listen to my mom and dad
I will be my best

Idaho

2011-10-17T10:44:00.000-07:00

Remember in the field we'd lie and wait,
As the snow fell down on their shallow graves?
Never did the moon ever shine so bright,
As the angels sang in the cold moonlight.

And praise the Lord while the church bells rang,
Sing all glory to his holy name,
I read the book it called for change,
I washed my blood stained hands in the cold steel rain,

Oh and I,
I have forsaken every curse,
Oh I, I have spoken,
Lord and I, have made my peace.

I'm headed north to Idaho,
I'll send a letter back when I make it home,
You see I'd follow you to the promise land,
I'd give you so much more than you ever had.

Oh and I,
I have forsaken every curse,
Oh I, I have spoken,
Lord and I, have made my peace.
Lord and I, have made my peace.

Town Across the Sea

2011-10-14T16:33:00.000-07:00

In a town across the sea,
I made eyes with eyes that freed,
Me from the pains of darker times,
But then they vanished in the night,

In a bed across the lane,
Where I'd lay both night and day,
Oh take me back to that place,
Make me young and there I'd stay,

To live my life on the border,
Between a man and a child,
The ocean breeze as my companion,
Won't you hold me soul for a while?

Well until again we meet,
Oh the joy that day will bring,
In the town where love was found,
Across the sea.

Through the window next to me,
The wind plays a melody,
Something sweet I can't explain,
But now I do not mind the rain,

Down on the cold streets below,
I heard a voice I thought I'd known,
Saying, "Come down here my love,
Lets go and dream of things to come."

And sing your songs about tomorrow,
But for now my dear don't waste the time,
Say good night on the corner,
You walk your way and I'll walk mine,

Well until again we meet,
Oh I can always dream,
Of the town where love was found,
Across the sea.

2011-10-14T16:32:00.001-07:00

there is something extra fascinating about a beautiful redheaded woman. you can't even argue with this.

2011-10-13T11:55:00.000-07:00

The sweetest compliment I've received in ages:

"You make me feel like I'm in a Jane Austen book."

2011-10-12T01:05:00.000-07:00

It's a good life.

2011-10-08T23:38:00.000-07:00

I've got good friends.
I've got a good home.
I've got a soft bed.
I've got a light pillow.
I've got a mind that is at ease.
I've got things to be excited for.
I've got a heart, a brain, and a body that work.

I've started recording the newest batch of songs.
I've got some new surprises.

Chee.

2011-10-05T17:01:00.000-07:00

East of Eden (Theology)

2011-10-02T13:28:00.000-07:00

“Dear Lord,” he said. “let me be like Aron. Don’t make me mean. I don’t want to be. If you will let everybody like me, why, I’ll give you anything in the world, and if I haven’t got it, why, I’ll go for to get it. I don’t want to be mean. I don’t want to be lonely. For Jesus’ sake, Amen.”

Slow warm tears were running down his cheeks. A child may ask, “What is the world’s story about?” And a grown man or woman may wonder, “What way will the world go? How does it end and, while we’re at it, what’s the story about?” (411)

"Timshel."
…I feel that a man is a very important thing—maybe more important than a star. This is not theology. I have no bent toward gods. But I have new love for that glittering instrument, the human soul. It is a lovely and unique thing in the universe. It is always attacked and never destroyed—because “Thou mayest.” (302)

I believe that there is one story in the world, and only one, that has frightened and inspired us, so that we live in a Pearl White serial of continuing thought and wonder. Humans are caught—in their lives, in their thoughts, in their hungers and ambitions, in their avarice and cruelty, and in their kindness and generosity too—in a net of good and evil. I think this is the only story we have and that it occurs on all levels of feeling and intelligence. Virtue and vice were warp and woof of our first consciousness, and they will be the fabric of our last, and this despite any changes we may impose on field and river and mountain, on economy and manners.
There is not other story. A man, after he has brushed off the dust and chips of his life, will have left only the hard, clean questions: Was it good or was it evil? Have I done well—or ill?

2011-10-01T21:40:00.000-07:00

The nuns taught us there were two ways through life - the way of nature and the way of grace. You have to choose which one you'll follow.

Grace doesn't try to please itself. Accepts being slighted, forgotten, disliked. Accepts insults and injuries.

Nature only wants to please itself. Get others to please it too. Likes to lord it over them. To have its own way. It finds reasons to be unhappy when all the world is shining around it. And love is smiling through all things.

The nuns taught us that no one who loves the way of grace ever comes to a bad end.

I will be true to you. Whatever comes.

The only way to be happy is to love. Unless you love, your life will flash by.

"Where were you when I laid the foundations of the Earth, when the morning stars sang together, and all the sons of God shouted for joy?" Job 38:4,7

I was waiting.

2011-09-14T14:26:00.001-07:00

Untitled

2011-09-01T12:43:00.000-07:00

These walls are not the walls, I've haunted all my days,
This penitentiary state of mind I've drifted in,
And yours is not the name, or your heart that I chase,
But your memory keeps telling me that there is reasoning
For all those claimed;
For every life that's been taken away.

And I'm a ghost in a strange house now,
But who here's really dead?
Is it me whose left to carry on
Or all my buried friends?
I'm a ghost in a strange house now
I'm a ghost in a strange house now
I'm a ghost in a strange house now
But I'm kickin' down the front door now.

Mystery is fine, but don't feed me your lies,
Some fabricated truth on which you desperately rely,
'Cause when it comes my time to forever close my eyes,
Whether it be dark or it be light, I'll greet it with a smile.

And I'm a ghost in a strange house now,
But who here's really dead?
Is it me whose left to carry on
Or all my buried friends?
I'm a ghost in a strange house now
I'm a ghost in a strange house now
I'm a ghost in a strange house now
But I'm kickin' down the front door now.

No but I dont' howl, up at the moon too much these days,
At the thought of men's leaving,
I put an end to all my grieving

No but I dont' howl, up at the moon too much these days,
At the thought of men's leaving,
I put an end to all my grieving

This house of fear has held me far too long...
But I'm kickin' down the front door now.

And I'm a ghost in a strange house now,
But who here's really dead?
Is it me whose left to carry on
Or all my buried friends?
I'm a ghost in a strange house now
I'm a ghost in a strange house now
I'm a ghost in a strange house now
But I'm kickin' down the front door now.

Small kine impulse pidgin convo.

2011-08-31T21:49:00.000-07:00

AP: I hate school these days. I just wanna play all day, er day.

KH: But den you going be sma kine dumb. You get one choice edumacation and den you get one cherreh job, den make choke dollas and dennn you play all day errryday.

AP:Buggah you try call me dumb?! Jus cuz I neva get one high school gradumacation neva means I no know how fo poke squid o do one hukilau and catch choke fish fo me, da keikeis, my aunties and uncos and een da titas and cronics dat stay ova there at seven eleven fo always. I know tings okay!

KH:hahaha bah, i just trying fo help you out k?! i nevah wen say no can catch coke fish and squid but wat if you catch um all, like draddah ash and sistah misty and da fren brock ova dea on dakine pokemon? You going run out of fish to catch and den what?!

AP: Braaaaah! one buggah has neva wen catched dem all! not now not nevas!!!

KH: Maybe you going be da firs. Bettah watch yoself boi

Don't go, Don't go, Don't go without me.

2011-08-30T14:52:00.000-07:00

I love this song. And I think I love that this music video is the only video for this song on the entire interweb. Enjoy the song and this Asian families Hawaii vacation, home video.

Maui 2010 from hanker9 on Vimeo.

Echo, Oregon

2011-08-09T16:49:00.000-07:00

Fourteen miles; such a heavy load,
It took both our courage just to drive that road,
And I said anything, to keep your mind off what was waiting at home.

Your mama swears that she starts every fight,
And she deserves the bruise beneath her eye,
She says your step-dad, he's just got too much on his heavy mind,

But if I'd been more than a boy, I like to say that I'd have done
Something to take you from that place.
And they ought to change that fucking name,
Above the "welcome to our town"
Ya'see your mama's not the first to cry out,
And get no answer from the clouds,
Atop the hills you hear no sound,
In this godforsaken town,
Welcome to Echo, Oregon,
Don't waste your prayers,
Down in Echo, Oregon.

The old men tell their stories every day,
Of hearts they broke and football games they played,
And drink their pain away, 'cause every story ends in the same place.

Your sister somehow made it out alright,
And took the first bus towards the city lights,
You said "let's runaway," and looking back now, maybe we should've just left that night.

And if I'd been more than a boy, I like to say that I'd have done
Something to take you from that place.
And they ought to change that fucking name,
Above the "welcome to our town"
Ya'see your mama's not the first to cry out,
And get no answer from the clouds,
Atop the hills you hear no sound,
In this godforsaken town,
Welcome to Echo, Oregon,
Don't waste your prayers,
Down in Echo, Oregon.

You said "let's runaway," and looking back now, maybe we should've just left that night.

J. Tillman

2011-07-24T21:13:00.001-07:00

Questions

2011-07-22T17:51:00.000-07:00

Did I make you up in my mind?
Did I fall in love with a dream?
But ain't it just like a young boy to do,
When he thinks he's found something true?
When he thinks he's found something true.

Took one look in your eyes and I was gone,
Head to California in the spring,
Drive that Ocean highway and I'll be there when you wake,
Funny how young love will change your ways,
Oh funny how young love will change your ways.

And on that July holiday I kissed you on the mouth,
And told you if I had to too, I'd choose you,
Over every love or anything I ever knew,
Oh I'd have done near anything for you,
Oh I'd have done near anything for you.

And I had so much more to say as you got on that train,
But I was sure that I would see you soon,
But you headed back on east and well your letters became few,
Lord almighty I missed you,
Oh Lord almighty I missed you.

So I re-lit old flames to simply pass away the time,
And keep my heavy mind off thoughts of you,
I fell into darkness but God knows I yelled his name,
Please let her know I love her still the same,
Please let her know I love her still the same.

Now I can feel the poison in my veins,
And soon enough I'll float beyond the trees,
Did my time away from you build faith in things untrue?
Did I love an illusion or love you?
Did I love an illusion or love you?
Did I love an illusion or love you?
Did I love an illusion or love you?

Mary

2011-07-22T17:45:00.001-07:00

Mary don't tell your mother,
She don't want you seeing me no more,
She'd lock you up and throw away the key,
'Cause Mary she don't know, no she don't know what it is you see in me.

And Mary don't tell your brothers,
They'll have more than words for me, I swear,
They'd leave me dyin' in a broken mess,
'Cause Mary they don't know, no they don't know how it is to feel like this.

And Mary don't tell your father,
I'll never be the man good enough for you,
He'd trade for you the arms of the richest men,
But Mary he don't know, no he don't know that I'll love you 'till the bittersweet end.

So could you lie for me me, lay by my side as your brothers bury me?
Oh could you die for me, deny your faith in your family?
I never asked for this, but sometimes love don't ask what you want at all.

So Mary don't tell your mother,
She don't want you seeing me no more,
But would you defy her words to love me free?
'Cause Mary she don't know, no she don't know what it is you see in me.

Suitcases

2011-07-22T17:33:00.000-07:00

You tell me that you love me and I believe with all my heart,
You say you'll take me as I am and forgive me all my wrongs,
And I know this for certain that you've been in love before,
And maybe there are times when your mind slips to a place,
When I'm not the one you love, or even part of the scene,
But I'm here and it's now, so it don't much bother me,
And I don't blame you, I know it's hard,
'Cause we both carry loads on our necks,
And our suitcases of where we've been;
They don't lighten up too much,
But you know I'm trying, and so are you,
You know I'm trying, and so are you,
And who you've become, is the person that I love,
The only one I love.

Well you tell me that you love me as you talk about that past,
And all of the good times that you had and how you wish you could have them back,
And I often feel that same, but I remember the sting,
You see, my memory don't easily forget those dreary dreams,
Of when I'd wake, and wished I hadn't,
Those are times that you may not need to know,
But I know, about your time in California,
And I don't need every detail to you know you were in pain
And our suitcases of where we've been;
They don't lighten up too much,
But I know you're trying, and so am I,
I know you're trying, and so am I,
And who you've become, is the person that I love,
The only one I love,

But I have stories, that you don't want to hear,
And you have stories, that I don't want to hear,
And there are things that we'd both rather leave unsaid,
And I look at you and darlin' I know you will understand,
That despite all of the harm that you have brought upon yourself,
And for every sin that calls out loud my name,
You gently reassure me that your love for me remains,
And to be with me is less a burden and more of a joy...

My dear I love you,
Oh dear I love you...

Faded Ways

2011-07-22T17:22:00.000-07:00

Although I cherished your faded ways,
I loved the night too much then,
And I held you close as the new year rang in,
But that fresh new start brought the end,
It was years ago,
When we hung those lights of gold,
And you begged me to come back,
And you begged me to come back,
Still you haunt my dreams,
Still you haunt my dreams,
In the sweetest way,
I've fallen for the night.

And how are you now, I've often thought,
Do you recall all the times,
In that motel where we'd both meet half way,
And fill up our young appetites,
And I'd drive away with a smile,
Back to the farm and you back to school,
And I begged you to come back,
And I begged you to come back,
Still you haunt my dreams,
Still you haunt my dreams,
In the sweetest way,
I've fallen for the night.

'Cause I was to frightened, you were my hope,
I was your dream, just some lost sinking boat,
Oh I loved the night too much then,
Oh I loved the night too much then,
Oh I loved the night too much then.

Home.

2011-06-22T17:49:00.001-07:00

I've always really enjoyed Rocky Votolato. Maybe it's the fact that he's from the Pacific Northwest, Maybe it's that we sing about similar topics, or have similar styles, Maybe it's because his music reminds me of home. I'm not exactly sure where home is anymore, but not having he ability to label an exact location, doesn't prohibit me from knowing what home feels like--I know what home feels like.

Songs For Eating and Drinking: Rocky Votolato from Chase Jarvis on Vimeo.

On The Floor

2011-06-22T03:05:00.000-07:00

East of Eden

2011-06-22T02:45:00.000-07:00

I've often thought of using "East of Eden"; the title of Steinbeck's great novel, (the other being The Grapes of W rath) as the name of a band. What do you think? I think it's moving and beautiful--as far as the book novel goes, I think fondly of it as well.

A couple of passages that I felt thought provoking and fun to read as of late:

"Oh but strawberries will never taste so good again and the thighs of women have lost their clutch!"

-I love that, is it entirely true? To some degree I truly believe so.

"And this I believe: that the free exploring mind of the individual human is the most valuable thing in the world. And this I would fight for: the freedom of the mind to take any direction it wishes, undirected. And this I must fight against: Any Idea, religion, or government which limits or destroys the individual. This is what I am and what I am about. I can understand why a system build on a pattern must try to destroy the free mind, for that is one thing which can by inspection destroy such a system. Surely I can understand this, and I hate it and I will fight against it to preserve the one thing that separates us from the uncreative beasts. If the glory can be killed we are lost."

-I also believe this to a certain degree.

Rosebush

2011-06-13T04:41:00.000-07:00

There's a place where the old creek bends,
Where I'll go to meet my end,
Ya won't be seein' me 'round here again,
I took my coins, and I put 'em in the boat man's hands.

There's a hurt too deep to tame,
Like a broken horse without a name,
In my mind; no I won't stay,
I've been looking, but I never found a better way.

I'was throwin' stones in the water, forgive my vanity,
That mirror held inside its hands; my hate.
But I'm not the only one, that's ever hid in shame.
There was a hazy day, a rose bush,
And a longing that'll never feel the same.

And I'll climb the tallest tree,
Just to see what I can see,
There's a song playin' on the breeze,
And a black crow flyin' 'cause he knows he's free.

And now I've tied it 'round my throat,
This rope like a winter coat,
Well I hope this pain ain't slow,
But as I go, won't you tell me that you'll miss me so?

I'was throwin' stones in the water, forgive my vanity,
That mirror held inside its hands; my hate.
But I'm not the only one, that's ever hid in shame.
There was a hazy day, a rose bush,
And a longing that'll never feel the same.

2011-06-13T03:49:00.001-07:00

This Side of Paradise

2011-06-12T23:49:00.000-07:00

"I simply state that I'm a product of a versatile mind in a restless generation--with every reason to throw my mind and pen in with the radicals. Even if, deep in my heart, I thought we were all blind atoms in a world as limited as a stroke of a pendulum, I and my sort would struggle against tradition; try at least, to displace old cants with new ones. I've thought I was right about life at various times, but faith is difficult. One think I know. If living isn't a seeking for the grail it may be a damned amusing game." (283)

This Side of Paradise--F. Scott Fitzgerald

Need

2011-06-09T16:34:00.000-07:00

I've been screaming from the start,
My pleads fall upon deaf ears.
I've been clawing at the throats,
Of all those I hold dear.
So come on tempt me at my worst,
Scourge with all your might,
I must find the heart to bury,
These ghosts that promise life.
I guess I just don't belong here,
I'd best be on my way,
By the time the next sun rises,
They'll have all forgot my name,
They sing love is just a feeling,
Life is just a test,
Fuck all of those cowards,
Who tell you they know best,

For what you need,
For what you need,
This ain't what I need.

Well I spoke to my brother,
I'm filled with joy to hear he' fine,
I ought to make my way to Oregon,
It's been such a long time.
Lord knows I need a season,
To plant some finer seeds,
Or to finally rest me feet somewhere,
Find something to believe.
Come what may and I will handle,
My resolve will hold me through,
Like the river I was born and raised,
And forced to grow too soon,
She whispers; love will hold you gently,
And life my hide it's claws,
But until the time I finally find,
I'll pay whatever cost,

For what I need,
For what I need,
This is what I need.

Can you hear, hear my song beyond the hills?
Can you hear, as the dessert stands so still?
Can you hear, from the valleys to the sea?
Can you hear, through the ancient hollow trees?

Hear me calling, For what I need.

This is what I need.

Flame

2011-06-08T12:59:00.000-07:00

Leave with me to anywhere you wish,
Seal my love forever with this kiss,
I never dream't that it would come to this,
Leave with me to anywhere you wish.

Let me be the stars up in your sky,
Lead you safely home through the night,
Lay your head down gently rest your eyes,
Let me be the stars up in your sky.

And in the darkness I will be your flame,
Tell me that you love me just the same,
Never calling out another's name,
In the darkness I will be your flame.

In the winter I will warm your soul,
Be your shelter from the bitter cold,
We will know a love; unknown, untold,
In the winter I will warm your soul.

Someday you and I will sail the seas,
Livin' on the mercy of the breeze,
Say those words and darlin' I'll believe,
Someday you and I will sail the seas

And in the darkness I will be your flame,
Tell me that you love me just the same,
Never calling out another's name,
In the darkness I will be your flame.

We will find our peace someday soon,
Beyond the dark horizon in the blue,
Where there's never spoke a word untrue,
We will find our peace someday soon,

But if you're gonna go let me go first,
I couldn't bear to live a life so cursed,
I love you so damn much baby it hurts,
So if you're gonna go let me go first.

And in the darkness I will be your flame,
Tell me that you love me just the same,
Never calling out another's name,
In the darkness I will be your flame.
In the darkness I will be your flame.
In the darkness I will be your flame.
In the darkness I will be your flame.

2011-06-06T22:48:00.001-07:00

Cause when the wind stole my walls, Lord knows, I never felt so alone.
With my hands full of stones, Lord knows, I never felt so alone.

Risky Business

2011-05-31T12:45:00.001-07:00

After getting only two hours of sleep last night I decided to purchase a red bull on my way to school. I didn't immediately start drinking it though, I actually forgot that it was in my back pack until I was in the library at school.... So... I know it's against the rules but I took it out of my bag and decided to drink it right there. This is risky business. As soon as the can was securely in my grasp I pulled it up in front of me. I have done this before, but the library was very busy today. I was slightly nervous. There was not a vacant computer and people were all on edge due to the final exams of the week. One of my techniques I use often while devouring small meals or drinks in the JFS library is to (fake) cough quite loudly as I simultaneously open a bag of food or a drink. I looked around to see if the coast was clear. I filled my lungs with air, confidently in my abilities to easily perform the cough-container open-indulge session, but before I even had the opportunity to fool those around me with my counterfeit cough attack, I mistakenly made direct eye contact with a library employee--home girl knew I was up to no good--she saw the can of Red Bull and I knew--I was caught red-handed.

She shook her head, "No you will not drink that red bull. Not while I'm here," I heard her mind's voice as her mouth stayed still, posed in an unimpressed frown.

I looked her back in the eye,
no disconnection from either end,
I shook my head and without words replied to her, "Oh yes, yes I will."
Without even a single white-lie of a cough,
I popped the lid,
her jaw dropped,
our eyes stay connected,
I lifted the can to my lips,
her facial expression voiced, "You little bitch, how dare you?!"
I raised my brow, smirk a little and she knows my thoughts, "I know right, how dare I?"
By this point she is out of her chair ready to walk my way,
she is 55 feet away.
I have only one option; I must finish the red bull.
The taste of aluminum, the smell of caffeine and that sweet aroma of fabricated energy goodness arose my senses. I tilt the can back.
The girl has made her way around her large, three employee seater desk, rounded the corner and is back in sight.
As my eyes stay fixed on her I can finally taste the powers that be; spewing from the silver can. It's so good. Too good to put down.
Like an obese, worried mother, making her way briskly to her endangered child, she rushes in my direction: Fast enough that if kept up longer than one minute a bead of sweat would appear; falling from her hairline--too slow to ever be described as an efficient means of transportation.
This can of Red Bull holds 16.9 fluid oz. (LARGE SIZE( Approximately 5 oz. have been drank so far. What do I do now? I ask not rhetorically, I ask because I came to a cross roads. I did not want to leave the library, I did not want to finish 16.9 fluid oz. of poison to prove a point, or any other reason one might think of, more than anything I just panicked and felt like the best option at that point in time was to finish the drink, stay in the library, and at worst receive the punishment of sternly being told, "drinks are not permitted in the computer lab." So I did just that.
With every step she took, nearing my computer, more and more liquid energy filled my body. She is within a paper-air-plane-toss-distance from me. My throat is burning, my eyes watering, and my life expectancy diminishing as the very last drops make their way from the can and into my nearly numb mouth. I have won the battle.

Sayde Price

2011-05-31T12:16:00.000-07:00

Music has such an effect on me. I am glad for the opportunity and gift of feeling emotions, and experiencing this beauty that is so easily accessible.

Sayde from Jeremy Prusso on Vimeo.